The Ego Cannot Be Reformed

Much effort has been spent trying to reform the ego. Much time has been spent waiting for the ego to get it.

I wanted it to see and align with what I know to be true. I wanted it to stand down — to reason its way into cooperation.

It cannot.

I had to quit flogging a dead horse.

The ego cannot be reformed. It can only be understood — and then, gently, denied. Not through violence or suppression. Through recognition. Through no longer treating its voice as the final word.

For so long, I believed its lies as mine. I adopted its fears as mine. I traded my faith for its doubts, my joy for its pain. I accepted its judgements and acted on its whims.

But truth has a way of dawning on the soul.

To understand the ego is to stop identifying with it. To observe the emotions and feelings it triggers — without being pulled into the drama. To notice the noise, and not become it.

The ego is still here. I expect it. I understand it. I even accept it. But I no longer feel obliged to draw my identity from its stories.

For the life which I now live, I live by faith.

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.

Galatians 2:20